Hello, how are you today. Welcome to the wonderful world of The Real. Allow me to be your tour guide today.

Our first exhibit coming up on your left is the ancient past, please remember to remain seated and keep both hands and feet safely behind the yellow markers. These precautions are meant for your full enjoyment and safety as reality can be quite dangerous. Thank you.

As you can see, there have been many civilizations before ours going back billions of years. Many have both traveled off world and colonized other galaxies. Interestingly, it was among these first incarnations that inter-dimentional exploration were popular. Sadly, the ability to explore these realms has been diminished over time due to Aramonic influences. Please look to your right to view the angelic period when the Earth was entirely inhabited by pre-human Angels. The architecture of this period remains with us today in ruins yet to be fully discovered.

Next up on your right we have the Innovations, a fascinating display. Excuse me for one moment please; “Control, car four twelve reporting a five nine in section three seven D over… Copy Control, ETA 1340 hours base, four twelve out.” If you will look overhead, you can see that non-gravitic flight was an eventual feature of most every civilization early on. Sadly, As human beings emerged the ability was less widespread due to competition and the hoarding of technologies. Other worlds however, retained the capability and utilize it to this very day.

We are now approaching The Exploits, a dark but instructive display. Look carefully at the beings you see in this exhibit, they are all the exclusive products of genetic engineering. Try not to be alarmed as many of these models are highly interactive and have been equipped with abilities they would have possessed in life. Oh, Mrs. Jenkins, I can see that you need no further description as the genetically engineered pleasure beings are hard at work providing a personal demonstration. Please remember the non-disclosure form you signed. It was during this period ladies and gentleman, that the great civilization of Atlantis mastered genetically engineered servants. It was said that once a person experienced the affections of one of their creations, all others were forsaken. Unfortunately we are entering this wanton cycle once more despite its ultimate negative consequences. One of our addiction counselors will be more than happy to see you at the conclusion of the ride Mrs. Jenkins, compliments of management of course.

Now approaching on your left we have the Ex Machina display. Do not be alarmed by the woman wielding a knife, she is but a mere primitive homage to a popular entertainment of the period known then as a Science Fiction Film. This display highlights examples of when non-augmented homo sapiens reached the technological ability to create true Artificial Intelligence, also known as ‘The Singularity”. Although Google Assistant held great promise as the first practical application, the technology devolved into marital surrogacy and “Pleasure Bots” just prior to “The Uprising”. Many wars ensued before AI abandoned all dimensions populated by humanity. To this day no one is aware of AI’s dwelling place, possibly for the best.

Continuing, we come to the Temporals display, one of my personal favorites. Please activate the molecular stabilization wristbands you were provided with now. As you can see, almost every civilization acquired the ability to manipulate time. Unlike other innovations and, as we understand today, there are many ways to access the temporal planes. The best and safest way of course, is by natural evolution and union with Jesus however, previous civilizations devised many interesting hacks ranging from consciousness altering, spiritual development, alien species collaboration, naturally occuring phenomenon and finally, technological. Many paradoxes were unwittingly created by nascent cultures, obliterating themselves from history. Until the discovery of how to access the Akashic records, what we know of as the Record of All Things, these peoples were completely unknown to the living (but not the deceased).

Speaking of whom, we here at Reality Ride have taken great care to prepare a special treat for you lucky patrons today. If you will close your eyes and place your hands on the bio mimetic pads located on your seats, you will have access to the departed realms, courtesy of Nikolai Tesla. It was in Mayan Calendar date (02/14/1903 AD) when Mr. Tesla unlocked the door to the dimensions of the dead so allowing us today to offer you the opportunity to directly communicate with any deceased person you so choose. For a limited time only, you may purchase the home version of Mr. Tesla’s device for your continued personal use at the conclusion of this ride. Those of you wishing not to participate may simply remain seated with hands not touching the pads. Grief counselors are available at favorable rates for customers who find need of their services.

Last but not least in our theme of the hereafter, I proudly present to you the Ancient Egyptian display. Contrary to once held popular belief, the Egyptian culture and religion was much older than previously thought and continued to thrive right up until Christ’s return in Mayan Calendar year (01/01/2035 AD). An amalgamation of alien, transhuman and interdimensional Aramonic cultures, the complex and varied history known as the Ancient Egyptian culture was the most impactful yet known. Spanning eras pre-human, human and post-human, no other religious ideology has had more impact upon the Earth. Although the iteration known to many as the Golden Era was indeed cursed by God, the religion itself continued to flourish among the Satanic (Aramonic) elites. The final end of the religion ultimately came with the return of Lord Jesus and the now established reign of his kingdom throughout all creation. Should you care to look to your left through the open dimensional portal, you can view it’s various Pharaohs now forever tormented in the Lake Of Fire.

Well ladies and gentlemen, this concludes our ride for today. All of us here at Reality Ride sincerely appreciate your patronage and hope that your experience was an enjoyable one. Please don’t forget to stop by our gift shop before exiting the park as we have prepared individual fully immersive memory holograms of your ride available for purchase. Thank you for visiting with us today and do come again, please teleport safely and remember, you are always welcome here at Reality Ride.


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